Having sex for the first time can be an exciting yet intimidating experience. It’s normal to feel nervous or unsure of what to expect. Here are some tips and advice on what to expect the first time you have sex.
First, know that everyone’s body is different and there is no one “right way” to have sex. It’s important to communicate with your partner to make sure you’re both comfortable with the pace and level of intimacy.
Second, you should know that there “will likely”could” be some level of physical pain involved. This is because the hymen, the thin membrane at the entrance to the vagina, can be torn during penetration, resulting in mild to moderate pain. It’s important to go slowly and use plenty of lubrication to reduce discomfort.
Third, it’s important to understand that sex is not just about physical pleasure, but emotional connection as well. This means that it’s important to talk to your partner about what you both want and need to feel comfortable and safe.
Fourth, it’s important to know that sex may not be as enjoyable as you expect it to be. This is because the first time can be awkward and uncomfortable due to a lack of experience. It takes time to learn what feels good and what doesn’t.
Finally, it’s important to remember that sex is about consent. Make sure that you and your partner are both comfortable with the experience and that you both consent to any sexual activity. Overall, the first time you have sex can be a nerve-wracking experience. It’s important to take things slow and communicate with your partner to ensure that you both feel safe and comfortable. Remember, there’s no one “right way” to have sex and it takes time to learn what feels good.
What to Expect
Is it going to be a wonderful, magical, emotional, spiritual experience? Well, probably not. In fact, here is our short list of what to probably expect in order to set your expectations properly.
- Its probably going to go poorly
You won’t really know what to do, when to do it, or how to do it
- Its going to be awkward
Yup, how do you “put it in”, how do you thrust, when is the timing right.
- Things probably won’t go well
So many things go wrong on a regular basis anyway, and the first time things don’t go right can feel embarassing
- You might get performance anxiety
Absolutely common right here. Being too anxious can keep her from being wet and him from getting hard
- What you do know, is probably wrong
Most of what you see in porn is not real. Porn is ENTERTAINMENT and is meant to stimulate you, it is NOT sex-education. Most women don’t like to spanked hard, get cum on their face, you never have anal without tons of lube, the list goes on and on.
Dispelling 10 Common Myths About First Time Sex
- If you don’t bleed during your first time, then something’s wrong.
Fact: Not bleeding during your first time is totally normal! It’s more of a Hollywood-constructed myth than anything else. This is actually still considered a sign of the woman being a virgin in some countries. The family will actually require a rag with blood spots to prove it. This is not only very wrong, but has caused many, many problems.
- You can’t get pregnant the first time.
Fact: You can definitely get pregnant the first time. In fact, you can get pregnant any time you have unprotected sex, so be sure to practice safe sex! At MINIMUM, use condoms, they are very effective.
- You have to be in love to have sex.
Fact: You don’t have to be in love to have sex- it’s totally up to you! Whether you’re in love or not, it’s important to be comfortable with the person you decide to have sex with.
- The first time will be painful.
Fact: The first time doesn’t have to be painful, and it can actually be quite enjoyable! Just make sure to communicate with your partner, take your time, and use plenty of lube. The #1 issue here is not enough foreplay or not using any lube.
- Guys will think you’re a slut if you have sex.
Fact: Your sexual choices are your own, and it’s nobody else’s business! You’re not a slut for having sex- it’s totally up to you and your partner(s).
- You have to have an orgasm the first time.
Fact: Not everyone will have an orgasm the first time, and that’s totally normal! Some people take time to learn what they like and don’t like, and that’s okay. This doesn’t mean you didn’t loose your virginity. Often it can take a number of times for your body to associate the new feelings with pleasure.
- If you don’t use a condom, you won’t get an STD.
Fact: You can still get an STD even if you don’t use a condom. Make sure to always use protection to prevent the spread of STDs and unwanted pregnancy.
- You’ll know what to do the first time.
Fact: The first time can be intimidating and confusing, and that’s okay! You don’t have to know exactly what to do- communication is key. While two totally inexperienced people can usually figure it out, sex often isn’t that simple. It takes time and practice to learn how to make things work well.
- You have to have sex to be cool or “normal”
Fact: You don’t have to have sex to be cool- it’s totally up to you! It’s important to make sure you’re comfortable and ready before taking the plunge. Some people wait until their 20’s, 30’s or even later. When to have sex is a totally personal choice and there is nothing wrong with waiting for it to be right.
- You’ll regret it afterwards.
Fact: If you’re comfortable and prepared, you don’t have to feel regret afterwards. It’s all about being confident and knowing what you’re getting into.
Now….how you handle all that is to have fun, laugh at the awkwardness, learn things together, experiment, enjoy each other. Don’t take it so seriously.
Come join the discussion on Reddit at r/SexyFunAdvice