In my beginner’s guide to prostate play I covered the basics, but people have been wanting more, so I will do my best to give you as much information as possible.
What is the Prostate Anyway?
The prostate is a walnut-sized gland that is a key component of the male reproductive system. The Prostate creates prostatic fluid, which makes up around 30% of the fluid that is ejaculated (sperm and fluid from the seminal vesicles make up the rest). The urethra runs through the center of the prostate from bladder to the penis (which is why sounding is effective, but that’s a topic for a future article).
Why Stimulate the Prostate?
By stimulating the prostate, a man can have what is referred to as a prostate orgasm. Unlike a penile orgasm, a prostate orgasm can feel like a total body experience, waves of tingling sensations, almost like electricity running through the body. This can be incredibly intense. There is also no refractory period (recovery time) from a prostate orgasm like there is with a penile orgasm, meaning men can have numerous prostate orgasms in a row.
In short, stimulating the prostate can result in mind-blowing orgasms.
Basic information and Misinformation
Ok, so we have enough reasons here to decide that stimulating the prostate can be an amazing experience, how do we go about stimulating the prostate?
The prostate is an internal organ, so there is no way to get to it directly, but the closest you can get is through the rectum. It is usually located about 2-3″ inside the rectum. That’s right folks, the best access to stimulate the prostate is through the poop chute. This may be a deal breaker for some people right off the bat.
How to Stimulate the Prostate
The first thing to note is that the prostate will enlarge and get warm as a man is sexually aroused, this is when it is most effective to stimulate the prostate as it will be in a state of readiness.
One of the most effective ways to stimulate the prostate is with a finger. inserting a finger through the man’s shitshooter and pointing towards the belly button, you should be able to feel the prostate through the rectal wall. A gentle tapping motion or moving the finger in a “come here” motion is going to be very effective. Unlike penile stimulation, prostate stimulation is a marathon, not a sprint. Getting a prostate stimulated to the point of orgasm can take 20-60 minutes, so be prepared for this to be a serious time commitment.
The second way to simulate the prostate is with toys. Dildos, prostate massagers, and vibrators are all commonly used. A method that is gaining in popularity over the years is pegging, where a woman wears a harness with a dildo attached and performs the same thrusting actions that a man does when having vaginal sex.
Proper Prep for Positive Prostate Pleasure
Ok, we need to address the question that is probably on most people’s mind at this point. Isn’t there poop in there? Well….no….and yes….and maybe. Actual poop is “stored” higher in the rectum and not in the lower cavity where we will be playing. Does that mean that there is no chance of shaking hands with Mr. Hanky? To be honest…no. Anytime you are knocking on shit’s door, you might end up shacking hands so to speak. This is where proper prep comes into play.
Next time you go drop a dookie, take a look at, it is nice and firm and all in one or several main pieces with a dryer texture to it? When you wipe, do you only need a small amount of tissue to get clean? If this describes you, then you are in pretty good shape. However, if your chocolate potatoes are wet, slimy, and loose, and you use half a roll of toilet paper to get cleaned up afterwards, then you need to add some fiber to your diet. Taking a psyllium husk supplement is inexpensive and flat out good for your digestion. Fiber will go a long way towards having a cleaner experience.
Of course, external cleaning is important. A good shower first or a nice cleansing with baby wipes will get your starfish all nice and pretty. Internally, an anal enema can be used to flush out any residual butt nuggets. Just a few flushes with just warm water until it is coming out clear will ensure a clean experience.
Using Toys for Prostate Stimulation
One of the first things most people try is to use your own fingers to reach in and massage the prostate. For many of us, this simply isn’t possible. While I can reach back to make sure my stink wrinkle is nice and clean, I just don’t have the flexibility to reach under and get enough penetration to get to my prostate. Of course, using someone else’s fingers (with a willing participant) is always an option.
For other people, some kind of prostate massage toy is going to be the ticket. Still others are going to like using a dildo of some kind.
A prostate massager is designed to sit inside your anal cavity and put gentle pressure on your prostate. There are several types of prostate toys including unpowered, vibrators, and thrusters. Speaking from my experience, and from a survey I did on Reddit, the vibrators, thrusters, and dildos often are too intense and the prostate is best served a dish of subtle pressure, almost teasing. A non-powered toy such as the Aneros Helix Syn Trident works by your own muscle contractions that cause it to move across the prostate area. This subtle stimulation takes a bit of a learning curve but is EXTREMELY effective once you have the technique down. One resource that many guys find useful is to lay down, put some ear buds in, and go to http://mindgasm.net and go through the free lessons, this will help you learn breathing, relaxation, and proper muscle control.
Anytime you are doing anal play, you need a good lube, the old Hershey Highway is not self-lubricating like a vagina, so lube is an absolute must here. Anal lube is basically a thicker version of regular lube so it lasts longer without drying up. The type of lube you need is dependent on the type of toy. Generally, water-based lubes are safe for pretty much everything but silicon-based lube should not be used with silicon toys.
A popular option is coconut oil, it lasts a long time and provides a great feeling. The only issue is that coconut oil is not safe for use with latex, so if you are covering your toy with a latex condom, or using latex gloves, the coconut oil will quickly break down that material.
What to Expect
Ok, you are cleaned and prepped, you have your favorite toy, you are aroused, relaxed, and ready. You lay down on the bed, you focus on your breathing and doing some contractions….what should you expect next? Generally speaking….nothing. Seriously, nothing. Maybe you feel some movement, but where are the waves of extreme pleasure? Well my dude, here’s the thing, the road to a prostate orgasm is often a long one. We are not used to this feeling and our brains may not be associating it with pleasure. Very, very few guys have success right off the bat. There are guys who took days, weeks, months, and even years of practice. Fortunately, the vast majority figure it out pretty quickly, often within 4-5 sessions. You will be VERY tempted to play with your penis at first, resist this urge, it will only make things harder to achieve, and for most of us, the moment your prostate gets stimulated, you can kiss any hope of an erection right out the window.
Maybe a month has gone by, things are really beginning to work, you’ve had some sessions where your legs just quivered uncontrollably. DO NOT CHASE THAT FEELING, this is important, you need to just relax and let things happen to you. This is not like a penile orgasm, this has to take time to build and there isn’t a “release” at the end, it is just wave after wave of pleasure.
The first few times you get these P-waves rolling, you may only be able to maintain them for a brief moment, this is usually because you start focusing on them, and that can cause you to lose it. The more you just let it happen, the better. As you progress and get more experience, and just enjoy what is going on, this is where things get really good, you may get involuntary contractions which will feel like, for lack of a better description, like the toy is fucking you on its own. You may also get crazy vibrations which feel amazing.
What I have described so far is the Hands Free Dry Orgasm (HFDO) which isn’t as accurate as it sounds because it is VERY like, and pretty much a given, that you will be dripping pre-cum out of your penis during this. You may feel an urge to pee, and that’s because the prostate sits behind the bladder and the pre-cum going through your penis also has that need-to-pee sensation.
The Holy Grail of prostate play for some is the HFWO, or hands free wet orgasm, and this is different only in that actual cum will come out of your penis….yes….even though you will be completely soft.
It is very hard to get everything that is possible to know into one article. Another great source of information is r/ProstateFun. I hope this has helped you to move forward on your prostate adventure.
Come join the discussion on Reddit at r/SexyFunAdvice